This week I received an email from a lovely woman who is grieving over a relationship she lost over 18 months ago due to a misunderstanding. Prior to the break-up, she dated the same man exclusively for about a year and a half. Though he currently has a steady girlfriend, he continues to maintain contact with this woman.
Upon his request, she has met with him several times. Each time he makes it known that he misses her friendship and would like to maintain it. Wisely, the woman refused, knowing that such a friendship would cause both her and his current girlfriend unnecessary grief.
This has become a great ordeal to her. She feels he still loves her and grieves for their separation. She would like to know what words Isis has for her.
My dear, you’ve spent far too long with this unresolved situation burdening your life. To find your joy again, you must remove yourself from limbo. You must build your courage and arrange to meet your ex. When you do, make it clear to him that you need to have a very important conversation with him and that it will most likely be your last.
When you meet, share your grief with him and ask what his feelings are towards you. Find out if he’s committed to staying with his current girlfriend or if he’s interested in reuniting. If he’s committed to her and says he just wants a friendship from you, do what is best for all involved and give him a final farewell, tell him not to contact you again and change your phone number. Should he wish to get back together instead, make it clear he can’t maintain a relationship with both of you; he must choose. Furthermore, if he chooses you, he isn’t to contact you again until he has explained the situation to his current girlfriend, broken it off with her and wished her a final farewell. Only then, will you be open to taking up where you left off.
By taking this seemingly hard-line approach, you’ll eliminate all doubt and open all the necessary channels for your grief to fade in time. Whether he returns to you or chooses the other woman, you will be free to determine what the next best move is for you.
If you have any general questions you’d like me channel for the goddess of the month, you can email them to me at email@example.com
P.S. If you are trapped in a situation like the one above and you need a goddess designed strategy unique for your circumstances, use my Ask the Goddess service.