I know that when you decide to blog you are inviting the whole wide world to read your words and look at any pictures you might post. You open yourself up to being available, albeit in a limited capacity, to everyone. I’ve found a lot of support, friendship and camaraderie plus I’ve personally gained a great deal of enjoyment (and therapy) from writing. I’ve shared my thoughts, feelings and family with you all.
I’ve been very fortunate that I haven’t been the object of any cyber-stalkers: those crazies who write emails and leave malicious comments.
Nope, I have a creep who knows me personally then informs others of my activities, which could only be known by reading my blog. He’s spending his time monitoring me, watching my personal life from afar and keeping tabs. This gives me the heavie-jeevies more than having a full-blown crazy person cyber stalker, especially as he already displayed stalker like activities in the past, appears to have serious control issues, meddles in his cowardly passive aggressive way and, to top it off, is a pathological liar.
I had my suspicions for a long time but it was confirmed for me yesterday with an off-comment by someone who knows us both. The penny dropped straight away and my first response was to stop writing and delete my blog. This is a person who has no claim to my life and why he would really want to know where I went last week, and then discuss it, is nothing short of skin-itching creepy.
Of course, there is always the possibility of people reading your blog who you really prefer not to so what can I really say about it? It’s my decision, after all, to write and I can’t choose who spends a minute or two reading about my life.
There are only a couple of reasons why this person could be interested in me.
- He has issues with releasing the past and moving forward with his own life, preferring to spend time virtually with me rather than move forward.
- He has unhealthy, compulsive tendencies to monitor people (i.e. stalk).
- He really likes my writing.
Google analytics is a wonderful piece of software that logs and monitors all visitors to my site. I’ve used it for years, all data stored away on secure servers with times, dates, IP addresses and such like. Google, those clever chaps, also let you see where your visitors come from and even give you detailed information as to what browser and ISP was used to come here. So, for a wild example, I can find out how many visitors from, say, a borough in South London visited me using an Apple device or Safari browser. They even log mobile phone visitors.
To my normal, non-creepy, non-sicko visitors I want to assure you that no personal data is transmitted by Google. Just general stuff like I explained before, nothing that I could identify you from Adam. That is unless I knew you personally and was clever enough to join the rather obvious dots. Then I might have a clue. And proof, should it ever be needed. You never know, do you?
That’s it. That’s all I have to say. I will keep on writing. The stalker creep will probably keep on stalking, those compulsive types never can give up. Pity really because for every second he’s reading about my life, he’s missing out on his own. What a sad, sad, little man.
it truly is pathetic that this person is so desperate to 'be' in your life that he goes out of his way to convince a mutual friend that he still is. do you suppose he looks in a mirror to convince himself of the same?
goggle analytics sounds neat.
I have this EXACT situation going on at the moment, ugh. I just try to keep writing about the good things in life so that they don't get any joy out of it! The most annoying thing is that they *know* I have a visitor tracker and they know that it shows their PC name, they know what we think of each other, and yet they still visit!
xoxo
I like your positive approach, Scarlett. I hope your creepy stalker leaves you alone. It's just so sad and pathetic *sigh*
Lyn, I am glad you are going to keep on blogging; that would give this creepo jerk too much power. He is pathetic, and it is smart that you can trace creeps like this, in case you needed to. I visit your blog all the time and enjoy your posts…the stained glass window/sunshine was breath-taking. Blessings and hugs from Robin.
Thanks for your support, Robin
x
I have had it happen in my past as well (on my first first blog back in 2005 or so), and I think my first instinct was to want to delete my blog. I didn't though, and I'm glad you won't either for I love your posts!
I'm glad you kept blogging too! And thank you for your kind words
I'm so glad you decided not to delete your blog.
Your situation reminded me so much of the problem I have with my ex-husband. Despite us both being married to someone else (him for 10 years, me for 6. This is no recent breakdown!), he's still far more interested in my life than he is his own. We call him 'The Slug' because of the slimy trail he leaves. It used to really get me down until I realised that meant he still had some control over my life. Now I just laugh at it
'The Slug'… genius!!!
Some people just blow your mind, don't they?? I can't believe this creep reads your blog every day then acts like that. What a creeper!! Good for you for standing your ground and deciding to just keep on doing what you've been doing. I love what you wrote and you know he will see it and get BUSTED!
Thank you, Tamara
I've had something similar happen. Online friend who was creepily obsessed with me. Demanded my attention day and night, was (or attempted to be) sexually abusive, manipulative, a liar and all host of other horrible things. It took a lot of work for me to finally get him to leave me alone, but I DO NOT regret it.
Joke's on him. His penis was funny-shaped. ;3
Oh! and I also had someone repeatitively facebook inbox me about how much I need Jesus, because my blog is so "worldly", how she hated seeing young people "lost in the world". Apparently having a blog where I post up makeup and pictures of my cats is a sin. ? I have so many great "plain-dressing" Christian friends (one of which is my own version of Granny Weatherwax), who are totally sane, but then you get the batshit mental ones…
Some people just have nothing better to do than monitor others.
You inspire me!! An award for you…
http://thekitchenwitchwearsprada.blogspot.com/201…
Happy Day!!
-A
Creep! sad but true, the internet is a wonderful thing, for the sane. Unfortunately it triggers even more madness into the sick. Keep blogging hun and stay safe, I have had enough crap in the past to not let it affect me, and yes google analytics rocks
, there are many ways to find out who people are and if someone like this think they are safe they are wrong! 
When I take photos of people I work with (who also know I that I blog), they will often ask why I don't post them online. But for every person who doesn't mind me posting his or her face, there is another person who does, so I've made it a goal to only post photos of myself and if they want their photos I will either email them or ask their permission to post them. Fortunately I've not had stalking problems, which of course doesn't necessarily mean that I don't have one. You never know in the cyberworld.
When I take photos of people I work with (who also know that I blog), they will often ask why I don't post them online. But for every person who doesn't mind me posting his or her face, there is another person who does, so I've made it a goal to only post photos of myself and if they want their photos I will either email them or ask their permission to post them. Fortunately I've not had stalking problems, which of course doesn't necessarily mean that I don't have one. You never know in the cyberworld.
That stinks! I started reading your blog about a year ago, I find it very informative and enjoyable. I check every couple days, so don't know if i classify as stalker, but no worries because i'm all the way in California.